Jan 28, 2020 in Exploratory

Spiritual Assessment

Practicing Spiritual Disciplines

Among a wide range of spiritual disciplines, I would like to place the emphasis on theology. First of all, I dealt with theology as a scientific discipline. I have recently finished a related course in the seminary so that certain knowledge has been obtained. Still, I should admit that I have numerous lacunas concerning theology as I found this discipline to be extremely complicated for me. I was tending to confuse theological terms with religious. That was one of my primary challenges as long as I was attempting to deepen my faith throughout learning more about God. Instead, theology confused me because I considered faith to be a personal matter which is why it was hard for me to place religion in the global context. Namely, it was difficult to regard the faith as a science even though the discipline is related to the divine knowledge.

In regards to theology in my daily life, I have to say that faith is related to the world around me. Therefore, learning the world around implies learning about God as long as the world is a result of God’s creation. Theology assists me in learning the world throughout the faith so that I grow spiritually as well as intellectually. It is becoming increasingly apparent that my practical knowledge of theology is much better than theoretical. I consider that to be an advantage as long as I am able to see God in any phenomenon or event on the planet. Hence, that leads me to a comprehension of the divine wisdom. In these terms, I do not regard theology as a scientific discipline because I use it for broadening my outlooks regarding God, faith, and the surrounding world. Needless to say, the rest of spiritual disciplines are also important to me, but theology made me realize that I can comprehend God in everything.

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Temptations

First of all, I would like to admit that my strongest temptation is related to eating chocolate excessively. I do not consider that as an addiction, but I feel a strong need in chocolate, especially during working days as I am getting tired physically as well as mentally. I started eating chocolate when I began attending the seminary. It can be explained by the fact that studying requires much of mental effort so that sweet products, especially chocolate, are the best booster of cognitive activity. Now, I eat at least one chocolate bar per day on a regular basis. It is an every day’s obligation for me otherwise I will not feel comfortable sufficiently while studying and working mentally. I am anxious about the temptation to become a complete addiction since excessive consumption of chocolate is unhealthy physically as well as spiritually.

As for distinct sins of mine, I should say that laziness is the strongest one. However, I make a big effort for working hard as my ambitions are stronger than laziness. Still, I am tending to give up pushing myself hard when I start facing some difficulties. I start thinking about doing nothing or surfing the Internet without a particular purpose as well as limit my communication with people to a minimum. I believe that I will be able to cope with this sin. In fact, I am dealing with laziness on a day-to-day basis as long as I study and work. Hence, I am concerned about my laziness to keep following me so that I will not be able to overcome this sin completely. I have certain questions for myself: how to differentiate tiredness and laziness? Will I start working with the same enthusiasm after a rest? Overall, laziness is my strongest sin, but I am convinced that I will be able to eliminate it with God’s help.

Blind Spots and Weaknesses

After interviewing my close relative, I found out that my evident blind spot is insufficient self-determination. It is certainly true as long as I feel confused very often while studying. In other words, I lack curiosity regarding some complicated subject. As I have already mentioned, I try my best to gain as much knowledge as possible. When I study something complicated and do not acquire the knowledge from the first attempt, I usually stop attempting once again. As a consequence, I have some gaps in knowledge, in theology, for instance. Under these circumstances, I usually lose my confidence so that it is becoming extremely hard for me to comprehend complicated study material. I would relate that to my laziness since I am sure about my internal motivation regarding the education.

To speak about my most significant weakness, I would mention panic in stressful situations. In fact, I start acting inappropriately as I lack rational thinking under stressful conditions. That makes me nervous so that it is tending to transform into a feeling of despondency. Needless to say, despondency is regarded as the deadly sin which is why I consider my weakness to be the most distinct threat to my spiritual growth. Thus, I should seek for a trouble-free environment at my workplace and at home. One may argue that it is an attempt to escape the problem, but the best way to avoid a threat is to take an opportunity. Consequently, I am strongly convinced that opportunities should be created which is why I regard a trouble-free environment as a method of avoidance stressful situations. This is the key factors for addressing my blind spots, temptations, sins, and ambitions.

Summary

On the whole, I should admit that this assignment has helped me to focus on my professional, spiritual, and life priorities. I distinctly see the gaps that I am planning to fill in the nearest future. Hence, I have to develop a plan for my spiritual growth as I want to advance in my faith with regard to different perspectives: eliminate my temptations, expiate my sins, improve my blind spots, and turn the weakness into strength. Needless to say, I expect to gain all these achievements with the help of God.

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